For those of you who don’t know what a “didgeridoo” is, dictionary.com’s definition is:

THIS is a didgeridoo:

Apparently, the band MYSTERY BLUE thought it would be “innovative” to try and incorporate this instrument into heavy metal music… IT’S NOT! Now don’t get me wrong, it is not used throughout the entire CD, but you will suffer through 2:24 of this as soon as you pop this in to your CD player and listen to track 1, “HumanE.T. (Nature’s Despair)”… AND… it gets WORSE from there. The track also features what sounds like the monkey from the movie “FACES OF DEATH ” being tortured and beaten over the head repeatedly! Yes… It’s that bad! I was almost inspired to call the A.S.P.C.A. to report the Incident!

Now the actual “CD” starts. I have to be honest here… other than track 4, “Dark Visions,” and track 8, “Desolation,” I only got through about the first 60 to 90 seconds of all the other tracks… that’s all my ears could take! This is absolutely HORRIBLE.

The band itself, composed of guitarist Frenzy Philippon, bassist Dany Ohlmann and drummer Vince Loehler, is not bad. There is some good guitar work and rhythms but they are ALL overshadowed by lead vocalist Nathalie Geyer who, most of the time, sounds like a cat in heat caught in a blender. Now I am not saying she has the worst voice I have ever heard because there are glimmers of hope on the 2 tracks I mentioned earlier. But overall, she is off key 90% of the time and just sounds abominable. This type of music is definitely NOT her forte. Two words for ya Nathalie… VOCAL LESSONS!

“Metal Slaves” is nothing less than a travesty. It ranges from the ridiculous to the outright laughable. It never ceases to amaze me, that there are bands out there and FANS even that think that stuff like this is GOOD! It awes me even to THINK they are serious.

Sorry MYSTERY BLUE but the only use I could ever see in this CD, is turning it over to the American government to blast into every cave in Afghanistan or Iraq… this would scare even the cockroaches out!

Band Lineup: